so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
