i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
This couple is walking their pig around campus
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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