is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
