Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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