and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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