The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize