that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
the condom got lost in my hair
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
