I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
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