whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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