): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
