The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
