My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
