what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
