Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
