I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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