Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize