I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
