The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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