Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize