Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Randomize
