Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Randomize