garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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