ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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