I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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