Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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