i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
