Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
