Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize