Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
