what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
