There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize