then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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