Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Randomize