Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
