I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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