He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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