so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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