Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
