with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize