I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize
