Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
