drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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