Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
vagina is talking i cant
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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