Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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