yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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