I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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