i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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