if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize