she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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