So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize